My reflection blog this week is reflecting on Ken Blanchard’s article “Situational Leadership: Adapt your style to their development level (Blanchard, 2008). Blanchard includes a leader’s directive and supportive behaviors as the foundation of situational leadership. In this blog, I will reflect on my roles as a parent and a leader within my organization.

Directive and Supportive Behavior

Directive behavior is engagement that is considered “one-way communication.” This type of behavior includes telling a person “what, when, where to do something” According to Blanchard there are three words to describe directive behavior “structure, control, and supervise.” (Blanchard, 2008)

Supportive behavior is an engagement that is “two-way” communication. This type of behavior includes “listening, support, encouragement, interaction and is involves decision-making”. According to Blanchard there are three words to scribe supportive behavior “praise, listen, and facilitate.” (Blanchard, 2008)

Parenting

As a parent of four grown daughters, I have been directive and supportive, depending on their age or situation. In the last 25 years as a parent, the road to today has been roller coaster of challenges, disappointments, and accomplishments. When the girls were very young and could not communicate verbally and efficiently, the communication was very directive in nature. This type of behavior was consistent throughout their life, but when they started to make decisions, the behavior became a mix mode of directive and supportive.

One of our daughters was very challenging as a teenager, including constant rebellion and defiance to any direction given to her. I wanted to control the behavior to keep her from making decisions that would lead to any type of criminal activity. I kept her from her friends, monitored her every move including online internet tracking, and kept a tight curfew. I could not trust her to make good decisions and keep her from harming her reputation or the families. The directive behavior from us as parents, made the situation worse.  I quickly seen we were losing control of our child and she was not listening to anything we had to say.

To be supportive, I enrolled the family into counseling to gain an independent analysis and get help. I removed myself from the communication with advise of the professional. I met with the professional after she met with my daughter. The feedback was that the parents did not listen to her point of view and gave up on listening to us because it didn’t matter as it was not our way. With the help of the professional, my daughter created her own corrective action plan to her behavior. My role in the plan became coaching and support. Our counseling as a family took about a year, but most importantly our relationship improved. As a parent, I had to learn that she can make good decisions and I didn’t need to be so directive on every aspect of her life. One step I took was to meet with my daughter once a week for a one-on-one conversation. I took the approach to listen. I also praised her on good decisions, and made recommendations in areas that needed additional coaching.

As grown adults, our girls are building new lives on their own. At this stage of their life, my husband and I are doing more coaching and supporting, providing less direction. If they have problems we delegate the decision making to them and provide solutions, if they ask for it. I do find it refreshing to see their decisions are aligned similar to something we have done if we were in the same situation. There is not a handbook on parenting and we have made mistakes. As your kids mature to different phases of their lives, parent’s behavior with their children is very situational. We tend to listen and praise more.

 A leader

My team is comprised of individuals whose tasks include contracting, estimating, financial planning, and scheduling. I am the only scheduler on the team of fifty people. As a leader within this team I use all four styles of directing, coaching, supporting and delegating, based on the situation.

As a scheduler, I design and manage a major aircraft development modification schedule. In order to design an effective schedule, I have to work with engineers, who are subject matter experts.  The engineers are not experts in using the schedule tools, understanding the metrics, or how to fix the tools when there are anomalies. Anomalies arise when there is a disconnect in the schedule and aligned costs. I use my coaching behavior by providing directions on how the tools work, how to fix metrics, and fix anomalies. The current project is the first to utilize a set of new electronic tool sets. I have spent the last year explaining and coaching this team to understand the tools.

An example of the team’s confidence occurred last week when I was discussing to the team of a new major project going on contract that will require the engineers to design a schedule. The engineers began asking questions on how to baseline the schedule, but would answer their own question before the stopped the question. It was like a proud mom moment, as I can see the maturity in their confidence and they were motivated to begin the next project. Another example of effective coaching is when the same engineers will not talk to our cost individual, because she is appearing to have an attitude and is rude when giving directions. The engineers will ask me for an answer prior to asking the cost team. They know I will listen and help facilitate an answer to help them with a problem. I do not have to use delegation within this team due to the high level of skill and responsibility of each team, people own their own work.

As president of the leadership organization, I am learning to be directive and supportive. A simple situation occurred a couple weeks ago where the deputy to the membership Vice President (VP), who wanted to question my direction of costs.  This person was the VP of membership last year and should have been aware of how costs are distributed and what they are used for. I directed the membership team to order some membership gifts to be given out at the upcoming national conference for the National Management Association (NMA). I sent an email request to the VP to approve the costs under the membership budget. The deputy sent me this long email about how membership gifts have never been funded under the membership budget. I had to take a deep breath before I responded, as the response had to be correct. In my email response I directed that all membership funded events, including merchandise would be funded via the membership budget. If the membership team needed to review their budget and provide a new spending plan based on the new direction, then take the necessary steps to do so.  In leadership positions such as president there are times I have to be very directive, depending on the situation. I am accountable for a large budget that is funded by corporate funds and membership dues. I took this opportunity to another level by coaching the new VP about the rules of his position, and that any approvals needed to come from him and not his deputy, keeping accountability aligned to the right position. He agreed and thanked me for being there to clarify the rules and support his position.

Conclusion

Blanchard defines that “you may use one leadership style for the team, but a different style when dealing one-on-one, as individuals are at different levels of development. Shifting back and forth makes this situational leadership” (Blanchard, 2008) As a parent, situations are different throughout our children’s lives, requiring a shift in directive to supporting behavior, as needed.  My team is filled with very skilled individuals, where I use a completely different leadership style in our day to day interactions. The team is confident and motivated to do their job, where I find supportive and coaching as the prime element to my success on the team. As the president, I am learning the value of delegation due to the skill levels on the team. However, not everyone is top notch and I am selective on which behavior to use, depending on the situation and perform of the individuals. I am only two months into this role and I am working harder at coaching and being supportive, by making sure I am available.

References:

Blanchard, K. (2008, May). Situational Leadership: Adapt your style to their development level. ProQuest Central, 25(5), 19.